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That I was there, or you were here,
Good morrow again, dear sirrahs ; one cannot rise for your play.--At night. I went this morning to visit Lady Kerry and Lord Shelburn, and they made me dine with them. Sir Andrew Fountaine is better. And now let us come and see what this saucy dear letter of MD says. Come out, letter, come out from between the sheets ; here it is underneath, and it will not come out.
Come out again, I says; so there. Here it is. What says Presto to me, pray ? says it. Come, and let me answer for
Hold up your head then, like a good letter. There. Pray, how have you got up with Presto, Madam Stella ? You write your eighth when you receive mine : now I write my twelfth when I receive your eighth. Do not you allow for what are upon the road, simpleton ? what say you to that ? and so you kept Presto's little birthday, I warrant: would to God I had been at the health, rather than here, where I have no manner of pleasure, nothing but eternal business upon my hands. I shall grow wise in time ; but no more of that : only I say Amen with my heart and vitals, that we may never be asunder again ten days together while poor Presto lives.---
I cannot be merry so near any splenetic talk; so I made that long line, and now all is well again. Yes, your are a pretending slut, indeed, with your fourth and fifth in the margin, and your journal, and every thing. Wind—we saw no wind here, nothing at all extraordinary at any time. We had it once when you had it not. But an old saying and a
I hate all winds, before and behind,
From cheeks with eyes, or from blind.
suppose you only mean a brick or two: but that is a damnned lie of your chimney being carried to the next house with the wind. Do not put such things upon us ; those matters will not pass here; keep a little to possibilities. My Lord Hertford * would have been ashamed of such a stretch. You should take care of what company you converse with : when one gets that faculty, it is hard to break one's self off it. Jemmy Leigh talks of going over ; but quando? I do not know when he will go. O, now you have had my ninth, now you are come up with me; marry come up with you, indeed. I know all that business of Lady S. Will nobody cut that D- -y's throạt! + Five hundred pounds do you call poor pay for living three months the life of a king ? They say she died with grief, partly being forced to appear as witness in court about some squabble among their servants.— The Bishop of Clogher showed you a pamphlet. I Well, but you must not give your mind to believe those things ; people will say any thing. The character is here reckoned admirable, but most of the
* Son to the Duke of Somerset.
† It is unnecessary to rip up the circumstances of this unhappy match, which the lady did not long survive. It has been already repeatedly mentioned in the course of the journal.
# He alludes to the pamphlet written by Swift himself, and entitled, “ A Short Character of his Ex. T. E. of W. L. L. of I-, with an account of some smaller Facts, during his Government, which will not be put into the Articles of Impeachment. London, Printed for William Coryton, Bookseller, at the Black Swan, on Ludgate-hill, 1711. Price 4d.”
facts are trifles. It was first printed privately here ; and then some bold cur ventured to do it publicly, and sold two thousand in two days : who the author is must remain uncertain. Do you pretend to know, impudence ? how durst you think so ? pox on your parliaments : the archbishop has told me of it ; but we do not vouchsafe to know any thing of it here. No, no, no more giddiness yet ; thank you, Stella, for asking after it ; thank you; God Almighty bless you for your kindness to poor Presto. You write to Lady Giffard and your mother upon what I advise, when it is too late. But yet I fancy this bad news will bring down stocks so low, that one might buy to great advantage. I design to venture going to see your mother some day when Lady Giffard is abroad. Well, keep your Rathburn and stuff. I thought he was to pay in your money upon his houses to be flung down about the what do you call it ? – Well, Madam Dingley, I sent your inclosed to Bristol, but have not heard from Raymond since he went. Come, come, young women, I keep a good fire; it costs me twelvepence a-week, and I fear something more; vex me, and I will have one in my bedchamber too. No, did not I tell you but just now, we have no high winds here? Have you forgot already?-Now you are at it again, silly Stella ; why does your mother say, my candles are scandalous ? they are good sixes in the pound, and she said I was extravagant enough to burn them in daylight. I never burn fewer at a time than one. What would people have ? the D_burst Hawkshaw. He told me he had not the box, and the next day Sterne * told me he had sent it a fortnight ago ; Patrick could not find him the other day, but he shall to-morrow : dear life and heart, do you teaze me? does Stella teaze Presto ? that palsy water was in the box : it was too big for a packet, and I was afraid of its breaking. Leigh was not in town then, or I would not have trusted it to Sterne, whom yet I have befriended enough to do me more kindness than that. I will never rest till
* Enoch Sterne, Esq. clerk to the House of Lords in Ireland, and collector of Wicklow.
I will never rest till you have it, or till it is in a way for you to have it. Poor dear rogue, naughty to think it teazes me : how could I ever forgive myself for neglecting any thing that related to your health ? sure I were a devil if I did. ************** See how far I am forced to stand from Stella, because I am afraid she thinks poor Presto has not been careful about her little things; I am sure I bought them immediately according to order, and packed them up
my own hands, and sent them to Sterne, and was six times with him about sending them away. I am glad you are pleased with your glasses. I have got another velvet cap, a new one Lord Herbert bought and presented me one morning I was at breakfast with him, where he was as merry and easy as ever I saw him, yet had received a challenge half an hour before, and half an hour after fought a duel. It was about ten days ago. You are mistaken in your guesses about Tatlers: I did neither write that on Noses, * nor Religion, † nor do I send him
* Tatler, No. 260. It is a lecture on the art by which
learned Taliacotius from
Cut supplemental noses This was a subject in Swift's manner; but the paper was written by Addison and Steele jointly.
+ This seems to be the No. 257, where there is a personificaof late any hints at all.— Indeed, Stella, when I read vour letter, I was not uneasy at all ; but when I came to answer the particulars, and found that you had not receive ed your box, it grated me to the heart, because I thought through your little words, that you imagined I had not taken the care I ought. But there has been some blunder in this matter, which I will know to-morrow, and write to Sterne, for fear he should not be within.—And
pray, pray, Presto, pray now do.—No, Raymond was not above four times with me while he staid, and then only while I was dressing. Mrs Fenton has written me another letter about some money of hers in Lady Giffard's hands, that is intrusted to me by my mother, not to come to her husband. I send my letters constantly every fortnight, and if you will have them oftener you may, but then they will be the shorter. Pray, let Parvisol sell the horse. I think I spoke to you of it in a former letter : I am glad you are rid of him, and was in pain while I thought you rode him : but if he would buy you another, or any body else, and that you could be often able to ride, why do not you do it?
2. I went this morning early to the Secretary of State, Mr St. John, and he told me from Mr Harley, that the warrant was now drawn, in order for a patent for the first-fruits : it must pass through several offices, and take up some time, because in things the queen gives, they are always considerate ; but that he assures me it is granted and done, and past all dispute, and de
tion of the Church of England, with the various religions of Popery, Judaism, and Deism, on her right hand; Presbytery, Quakerism, and other fanatical sects, on her left. The paper has something of Swift's emblematical manner, but, like the former, was written by Addison and Steele.