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thing, but I'll reward thy love, and recompense thy noble passion.

Colonel S. Sir Harry, ha! ha! ha! Poor Sir Harry, ha! ha! ha! Rather kiss her hand than the Pope's toe; ha ha ha!

Lady L. What, Sir Harry, colonel? What, Sir Harry?

Colonel S. Sir Harry Wildair, madam.

Lady O. What! is he come over?

Colonel S. Ay, and he told me--but I don't believe a syllable on't

Lady L. What did he tell you?

Colonel S. Only called you his mistress; and, pretending to be extravagant in your commendation, would vainly insinuate the praise of his own judgment and good fortune in a choice.

Lady L. How easily is the vanity of fops tickled by our sex!

Colonel S. Why, your sex is the vanity of fops. Lady L. On my conscience, I believe so. This gentleman, because he danced well, I pitched on for a partner at a ball in Paris, and ever since he has so persecuted me with letters, songs, dances, serenading, flattery, foppery, and noise, that I was forced to fly the kingdom.- -And I warrant you he made you jealous?

Colonel S. 'Faith, madam, I was a little uneasy.

Lady L. You shall have a plentiful revenge; I'll send him back all his foolish letters, songs, and verses, and you yourself shall carry them: 'twill afford you opportunity of triumphing, and free me from his further impertinence; for of all men he's my aversion. I'll run and fetch them instantly.

[Exit.

Colonel S. Dear madam, a rare project! Now shall I bait him, like Acteon, with his own dogs.-Well, Mrs Parly, it is ordered by act of parliament, that you receive no more pieces, Mrs Parly.

Parly. 'Tis provided by the same act, that you

send no more messages by me, good colonel: you must not presume to send any more letters, unless you can pay the postage.

Colonel S. Come, come, don't be mercenary; take example by your lady, be honourable.

Parly A-lack-a-day, sir, it shows as ridiculous and haughty for us to imitate our betters in their honour, as in their finery; leave honour to nobility that can support it; we poor folks, colonel, have no pretence to it; and truly, I think, sir, that your honour should be cashiered with your leading-staff.

Colonel S. 'Tis one of the greatest curses of poverty to be the jest of chambermaids!

Enter LUREWELL.

Lady L. Here's the packet, colonel; the whole magazine of love's artillery. [Gives him the packet. Colonel S. Which, since I have gained, I will turn upon the enemy. Madam, I'll bring you the news of my victory this evening. Poor Sir Harry, ha! ha! Exit. Lady L. To the right about; as you were; march, colonel. Ha! ha! ha!

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Vain man, who boasts of studied parts and wiles!
Nature in us, your deepest art beguiles,
Stamping deep cunning in our frowns and smiles.
You toil for art, your intellects you trace;
Woman, without a thought, bears policy in her

face.

[Exeunt.

C

ACT THE SECOND.

SCENE 1.

CLINCHER JUNIOR'S Lodgings.

Enter CLINCHER JUNIOR, opening a Letter; SERVANT following.

Clinch. jun. [Reads.] Dear Brother-I will see you presently: I have sent this lad to wait on you; he can instruct you in the fashions of the town. I am your affectionate brother, CLINCHER.

Very well; and what's your name, sir?

Dicky. My name is Dicky, sir.

Clinch. jun. Dicky!

Dicky. Ay, Dicky, sir.

Clinch. jun. Very well; a pretty name! And what can you do, Mr Dicky?

Dicky. Why, sir, I can powder a wig, and pick up a whore.

Clinch. jun. Oh, lord! Oh, lord! a whore! Why, are there many in this town?

Dicky. Ha! ha! ha! many! there's a question, indeed 1- -Hark ye, sir; do you see that woman there, in the pink cloak and white feathers? Clinch.jun. Ay, sir! what then?

Dicky. Why, she shall be at your service in three minutes, as I'm a pimp.

Clinch. jun. Oh, Jupiter Ammon! Why, she's a gentlewoman.

Dicky. A gentlewoman! Why, so they are all in town, sir.

C

Enter CLINCHER SENIOR.

Clinch. sen. Brother, you're welcome to London. Clinch. jun. I thought, brother, you owed so much to the memory of my father, as to wear mourning for his death.

Clinch. sen. Why, so I do, fool; I wear this, because I have the estate; and you wear that, because you have not the estate. You have cause to mourn, indeed, brother. Well, brother, I'm glad to see you; fare you well. [Going. Clinch. jun. Stay, stay, brother.Where are you going?

Clinch. sen. How natural 'tis for a country booby to ask impertinent questions!-Hark ye, sir; is not my father dead?

Clinch. jun. Ay, ay, to my sorrow.

Clinch. sen. No matter for that, he's dead; and am not I a young, powdered, extravagant, English heir? Clinch jun. Very right, sir.

Clinch. sen. Why then, sir, you may be sure that I am going to the jubilee, sir.

Clinch. jun. Jubilee! What's that?

Clinch. sen. Jubilee! Why, the jubilee is—'Faith I don't know what it is.

Dicky. Why, the jubilee is the same thing as our Lord Mayor's-day in the city; there will be pageants, and squibs, and raree-shows, and all that, sir.

Clinch. jun. And must you go so soon, brother? Clinch sen. Yes, sir; for I must stay a month at Amsterdam, to study poetry.

Clinch. jun. Then I suppose, brother, you travel through Muscovy, to learn fashions; don't you, bro

ther?

Clinch. sen. Brother! Pr'ythee, Robin, don't call me brother; sir will do every jot as well.

Clinch. jun. Oh, Jupiter Ammon! why so?

Clinch. sen. Because people will imagine you have a spite at me.-- -But have you seen your cousin Angelica yet, and her mother, the Lady Darling?

Clinch. jun. No; my dancing-master has not been with me yet. How shall I salute them, brother? Clinch. sen. Pshaw! that's easy; 'tis only two scrapes, a kiss, and your humble servant. more when I come from the jubilee.

I'll tell you Come along.

[Exeunt.

SCENE II.

LADY DARLING's House.

Enter SIR H. WILDAIR with a Letter.

Sir H. Like light and heat, incorporate we lay; We bless'd the night, and cursed the coming day. Well, if this paper kite flies sure, I'm secure of my game Humph!-the pretiest bourdel I have seen; a very stately genteel one.

FOOTMEN cross the Stage.

Hey-day! equipage too;'Sdeath, I'm afraid I've mistaken the house!

Enter LADY DARLING.

No, this must be the bawd, by her dignity.
Lady D. Your business, pray, sir?

Sir H. Pleasure, madam.

Lady D. Then, sir, you have no business here.
Sir H. This letter, madam, will inform

you farther. Mr Vizard sent it, with his humble service to your ladyship.

Lady. D. How does my cousin, sir?

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