For pity's sake, it would be just, BETTESWORTH'S EXULTATION UPON HEARING THAT HIS NAME WOULD BE TRANSMITTED TO POSTERITY IN DR SWIFT'S Works. BY WILLIAM DUNKIN. WELL! now, since the heat of my passion's abated, That the Dean hath lampoon'd me, my mind is elated : Lampoon'd did I call it ?-No-what was it then? Half lawyer, half actor, pert, dull, and inglorious, Though my title be spurious, why should I be dastard, A man is a man, though he should be a bastard. Why sure 'tis some comfort that heroes should slay us, If I fall, I would fall by the hand of Æneas; And who, by the Drapier would not rather damn'd be, Than demigoddized by madrigal Namby. * A man is no more, who has once lost his breath; So the lines be well drawn, and the colours but strike, To a judge 'tis all one which he fixes his eye on, * Ambrose Philips. AN EPIGRAM, INSCRIBED TO THE HONOURABLE SERGEANT Kite. [Now first published from a copy in the Dean's hand-writing, in possession of J. Connill, Esq.] IN In your indignation what mercy appears, While Jonathan's threaten'd with loss of his ears; For who would not think it a much better choice, By your knife to be mangled than rack'd with your voice. If truly you [would] be reveng'd on the parson, Command his attendance while you act your farce on, Instead of your maiming, your shooting, or banging, * Bid Povey secure him while you are haranguing. Had this been your method to torture him, long since, He had cut his own ears to be deaf to your non sense. * Povey was serjeant-at-arms to the House of Commons, THE YAHOO'S OVERTHROW; OR, THE UPON SERGEANT KITE'S INSULTING THE DEAN. [Grub Street Journal, No. 189, August 9, 1734.-"In December last Mr Bettes worth of the city of Dublin, sergeant-at-law and Member of Parliament, openly swore, before many hundreds of people, that, upon the first opportunity, by the help of ruf fians, he would murder or maim the Dean of St Patrick's, (Dr Swift.) Upon which thirty-one of the principal inhabitants of that liberty signed a paper to this effect: That, out of their great love and respect to the Dean, to whom the whole kingdom hath so many obligations, they would endeavour to defend the life and limbs of the said Dean against a certain man and all his ruffians and murderers.' With which paper they, in the name of themselves and all the inhabitants of the city, attended the Dean on January 8, who being extremely ill in bed of a giddiness and deafness, and not able to receive them, immediately dictated a very grateful answer. The occasion of a certain man's declaration of his villainous design against the Dean was a frivolous unproved suspicion that he had written some lines in verse reflecting upon him."*] JOLLY boys of St Kevan's, St Patrick's, Donore, And Smithfield, I'll tell you, if not told before, * See Vol. XVIII. p. 247, note. Kevan Bayl was a cant expression for the mob of this district of Dublin. Ibid. p. 307. How Bettesworth, that booby, and scoundrel in grain, Has insulted us all by insulting the Dean. Knock him down, down, down, knock him down. The Dean and his merits we every one know, But this skip of a lawyer, where the De'il did he grow? How greater his merit at Four Courts or House, Than the barking of Towzer, or leap of a louse! Knock him down, &c. That he came from the Temple, his morals do show; But where his deep law is, few mortals yet know : Knock him down, &c. This pedlar, at speaking and making of laws, Has met with returns of all sorts but applause ; Has, with noise and odd gestures, been prating some years, What honester folk never durst for their ears. Knock him down, &c. Of all sizes and sorts, the fanatical crew Are his brother protestants, good men and true, Red hat, and blue bonnet, and turban's the same, What the De'il is't to him whence the Devil they came. Knock him down, &c. Hobbes, Tindal, and Woolston, and Collins, and Nayler, And Muggleton, Toland, and Bradley the tailor, Knock him down, &c. |