and gave it to the disciples, and said, Take, eat, this is my body." And his argument was this, That Christ, being the Word of God, and the truth, whatever he said must be positively and literally true; and therefore there is a real change of the bread into the true and real body of Christ: and this being an ordinance of God to his ministers, the same power is annexed to that ordinance; since, at the same time, he commanded them to do the same, saying, "This do in remembrance of

me.

taking up a plate] no man, for instance, can truly and literally say, this is a plate, if it were not a plate before. Then, by a parity of reason and truth, Christ could not say, this bread is my body, if it were not his body before. Therefore these words made no alteration, for it was so before; these words were only declarative of what was before, and not initiatory, or commencive of a new being, which was not there before. Again, if ever these words had effected a transubstantiation, they would when Christ himself uttered them. During this uninterrupted discourse, my Consider then, pray, that as soon as Christ zeal was kindled, so that I could scarcely began to speak these words, "This is my contain it. But being young, and diffident of body," the body of Christ, born of the Virgin my own abilities, and paying regard and pre- Mary, began to cease to be his body, and the ference to our two ministers present, and ex- bread began to convert into it; and that, as pecting their appearance against so great an soon as the words were finished, the body error, and so opposite to the Protestant reli- born of the Virgin, altogether ceased to be gion, I delayed till it became almost unsea- what it was before; and, by a new way of sonable to engage him. But they minding corporeal transmigration, insinuated itself into their plates, and hanging down their heads, the bread; which, by the same degrees that with their countenances veiled by their hats; the body of Christ ceased to be his body, and I seeing no sign of any answer from them commenced, proceeded, grew, and became his to the papist, I took him up upon the subject, thus:

You of the church of Rome take these words literally; but we take the whole form of his speech at that time on that subject, to be figurative; and that these words, "This is my body," intended no more than, This bread is a symbol, or figure, or representation of my body, which shall shortly hereafter be broken for you: for we ought not to divide the sentence or speech of Christ, and take one part literally and another figuratively. And you may remember that, at the same time, he also took the cup, saying, "This cup is the New Testament, in my blood, which is shed for you." Do you think that that cup, whether of gold, silver, glass, or wood, was the New Testament? Or can't you see, that in this latter part of his speech there is a double figure? First, the thing containing for the thing contained; and secondly, the wine in the cup, exhibited under the word cup, as a figure or representation of his blood; which was not then actually, or literally shed, or his body broken. And seeing he said, in the present tense, "This is my body which is broken (not to be broken) for you; and this cup is the New Testament in my blood, which is (not which shall hereafter be) shed for you;" you must either own that Christ advanced a false proposition, which you will not; or that he spoke figuratively in both sentences; which you cannot reasonably avoid. Besides, the words uttered by Christ himself, did not work that effect you imagine; for no man can call a thing by any name, denoting its existence, before it is that thing which it is called: [then

body; or else he had two bodies present with his disciples at the same time; and if they eat his body that evening, what body was that which was crucified the next day? And what blood was then shed, if, the night before, the disciples had drank the blood of Jesus in a proper and literal sense, and without a figure? And where now is that same cup? If you have lost that, you have, in your own sense, lost the New Testament, and all your share therein. Now, if you can persuade me and this company out of our senses and understandings, so that we may be able to believe against both, that a piece of bread is the body of Christ, and a cup of wine is his blood, then you may bid fair for our conversion, or rather perversion, to your religion. But, till you can do that, you cannot reasonably expect we should embrace so great absurdities. Upon this, several of the company laughed; and the Papist said these were great mysteries, and the subject copious and intricate, and could not, at that time, be fully prosecuted, but might be more largely discussed at some other convenient opportunity. I replied, then why did you move it? Could you think we would all sit silent, to hear you propagate such notions, and make no opposition? And so the matter dropped. But though I had thus opposed him, he showed more respect to me afterwards than to any other of the company.

Dinner being over, our ministers retired into another room, and I went to them; where, with much seeming respect, they addressed themselves to me after this manner, "We are very glad to hear you have so much

to say in defence of our religion, and that Lord Delamere, then in arms, in favour of you managed the debate so that he got no the Prince, it gave him great satisfaction. advantage, nor could maintain his point." But the noise of passive obedience and nonBut I, being still under the grief and shame, resistance being still fresh in my ears; and, as well as resentment, of their temporizing thinking the clergy would oppose their late cowardice and negligence, quickly returned doctrine by a contrary practice, I inserted thus: "And I, gentlemen, am very much this sentence in the close of my letter: "Howgrieved and ashamed to find that you had no- ever, I could now wish that those who have thing at all to say in defence of it, which I so lately been preaching passive obedience to very much wondered at; for I so long ex- others, may not be found in actual rebellion pected one of you would have engaged the themselves." I was not aware into whose gentleman, that it was almost unseasonable hands it might fall; nor had I penetration to make any answer." enough to discern, or apprehend the subtle distinctions contrived by the learned clergy to reconcile their practice to their doctrine; distinguishing and explaining it so as to make it, at last, passive obedience and no passive obedience. But the sentence above being then unfashionable, my brother was directed to admonish me to forbear meddling any more with that subject.

To this they replied, that I might do it a great deal better and safer than they; for it would have been more taken notice of, and worse resented in them; and might have been greatly to their future prejudice.

This reply, from men of their profession, at such a crisis, when our religion was apparently in the most imminent danger, bore such an aspect of temporizing, and was so suspi- These things gave me still more occasion cious of a secret inclination to apostatize from to reflect, and closely to consider the foundtheir own avowed principles and to conformation of our own religion and of those who to Popery, then ready to force its way into pretended to propagate it. For though that fashion, that it very much offended me, in- doctrine, rightly stated, is a Christian doctrine creasing my former disgust; and occasioned and duty, yet the failure in practice renders such a crowd of thoughts in my mind about that testimony, as to them, void, how nicely the clergy and the religion they pretended and subtilly soever they may interpret themto propagate, that I said no more to them selves out of the practice of what the people about it. understood, and the priests intended they should understand by it at that time.

This was towards the end of August, in the year 1688; and not long after, arrived the Prince of Orange; at whose appearance, that party which had but a little before, been so very high, despotic, and rampant, were at once universally dispirited and dejected to such a degree, that they stole away from some places in the night, particularly Carlisle. There was a strong castle here, and other fortified holds, and the city surrounded with a high and strong wall, and well stored with ammunition; which made many judge that their guilt, and the consciousness of their own evil designs against the Protestants, were the main ground of the panic which seized them at the news of the arrival of that Protestant prince; with whom they had good ground to believe the Protestants had a secret understanding; and with whom, most likely, they would quickly join; which accordingly happened at the erecting of his standard and displaying his banners.

But though I was well pleased with the revolution of affairs at that time, the circumstances thereof being attended with sufficient evidence of a very particular providence of the Almighty, yet I took offence at the clergy's appearing so much in it as they did, who had lately so vehemently preached up contrary principles.

This great and sudden revolution in the government seemed to unhinge things for a time; and few, if any, knew where they would at last fix. The church was divided in judgment, if not in interest; some few keeping to the practice of their former doctrine, but the generality receding from it. So that, for my own part, being young, and only a private person, I could not see any certainty in any thing we called religion, state, or poli tics; all being interpreted as served the times; or as if none of them had any certain or steady bottom, or longer continued the same, Being at Carlisle when this surprising de- than the humour or interest of Pretenders run parture of the Popish party happened, and that way. Christianity, heaven, and eternal with them our great fears, I wrote to my bro- life, and the way thither, were the general ther, chaplain to the Countess Dowager of pretences of so many insincere and empty Carlisle, and then with her at Howard castle, professors of Christ, wholly strangers to his in Yorkshire, a full and particular account of all the circumstances of it; which being intercepted, with other letters, and sent to the

holy and divine nature; that under deep humiliation in a view of these things, and of my own want of an experimental knowledge of

The lust of the flesh, of the eye, and the pride of life, had their objects and subjects presented. The airs of youth were many and potent; strength, activity, and comeliness of person were not wanting, and had their share; nor were natural endowments of mind or competent acquirements afar off; and the glory, advancements and preferments of the world, spread as nets in my view, and the It was this: Intending to go to a country friendship thereof beginning to address me church with an acquaintance, as we were with flattering courtship. I wore a sword, riding gently along, my horse stumbling, fell the use of which I well understood, and had and broke his neck, and lay so heavy upon foiled several masters of that science in the my leg that I could scarcely draw it from north and at London; and rode with fire-arms under him; yet I received no hurt. But as also, of which I knew the use; and yet I was we stood by him I had this consideration, that not quarrelsome; for though I emulated, I my own life might have been ended by that

occasion, and I did not find myself in a con- thirsting unto death for the knowledge of the dition fit for heaven, having yet no evidence Way of Life, he was pleased to hear the of that necessary work of regeneration. This brought great heaviness over my mind, which did not totally depart till, through the infinite mercy of God, I was favoured with further knowledge and a better state.

voice of my necessity; for I wanted present salvation, and the Lord knew my case could not admit of further delay. Being moved by his own free mercy and goodness, even in the same love in which he sent his Son, the beloved, into the world, to seek and save the lost; on the 1st day of the second month, in the evening, in the year, according to the common account, 1689, being alone in my chamber, the Lord brake in upon me unexpectedly; quick as lightning from the heavens, and as a righteous, all-powerful, all-knowing, and sin-condemning Judge: before whom my soul, as in the deepest agony, trembled, was confounded and amazed, and filled with such awful dread as no words can reach or declare.

My mind seemed plunged into utter darkness, and eternal condemnation appeared

Hitherto I had known the grace of God in me only as a manifester of evil and of sin, a word of reproof, and a law condemning and judging those thoughts, desires, words, passions, affections, acts and omissions, which are seated in the first nature, and rooted in the carnal mind; in which the suggestions, temptations, and influences of the evil one work and prevail. By this divine grace I was, in some good degree, enlightened, reformed, and enabled to shun and forbear all words and acts known to be evil, and moral righteousness restored in my mind, and thereby brought forth in me. I became then weaned from all my former acquaintance and com- to inclose me on every side, as in the centre pany; their manners and conversation, though of the horrible pit; never to see redemption not vicious, for such I never liked, became thence, or the face of him in mercy, whom I burdensome and disagreeable; for they had had sought with all my soul. But in the not the knowledge of God, nor such a con- midst of this confusion and amazement, where versation as I wanted. Yet I did not know no thought could be formed, or any idea rethe divine grace in its own nature, as it is in tained, save eternal death possessing my whole Christ; not as a word of faith, sanctification, man, a voice was formed and uttered in me, justification, consolation and redemption; being "Thy will, O God, be done; if this be thy yet alive in my own nature. The Son of God act alone, and not my own, I yield my soul was not yet revealed in me; nor I, by the to thee." In conceiving these words, from power of his holy cross, mortified and slain; the Word of Life, I quickly found relief: being without the knowledge of the essential there was all-healing virtue in them; and the truth, and in a state contrary to him, and un-effect was so swift and powerful, that, even in reconciled. But the Lord did not leave me a moment, all my fears vanished, as if they here, but, in his matchless mercy, followed had never been, and my mind became calm me still by his holy admonitions, and more and more inclined my mind in an earnest inquiry after himself, and his own truth and Word; concerning whom, I did not know of any in all the earth who could teach me, the world being universally, as I judged by the In this wonderful operation of the Lord's general ways and courses of men, of all forms power, denouncing judgment in tender mercy, and ranks, altogether ignorant of the Lord, and in the hour of my deepest concern and knowing only some historical and traditional trial, I lost my old self, and came to the behints concerning him, and of his doctrine and ginning of the knowledge of Him, the just and ways; which having little or no effect or in- the Holy One, whom my soul had longed for. fluence upon the minds and conversations of I now saw the whole body of sin condemned men, it seemed but a dead knowledge or image, and they being dead whilst they yet lived, did not really and savingly believe in the true God, and Christ Jesus, of whom they made profession and talked. I did not then know that the Lord had any people in the world, owned by his presence with them, as his flock and family; which reminds me of that saying of the Lord, "Nevertheless, when the Son of Man cometh, shall he find faith on the earth?"

and still, and simple as a little child; the day of the Lord dawned and the Son of Righteousness arose in me, with divine healing and restoring virtue in his countenance; and he became the centre of my mind.

in my own flesh; not by particular acts, as whilst travelling in the way to a perfect moral state only, but by one stroke and sentence of the great Judge of all the world, of the living and of the dead, the whole carnal mind, with all that dwelt therein, was wounded, and death begun; as self-love, pride, evil thoughts, and every evil desire, with the whole corruption of the first state and natural life.

Here I had a taste and view of the agony of the Son of God, and of his death and state

My mind being truly earnest with God, upon the cross, when the weight of the sins

in assuming human nature, and clothing therewith his inaccessible divine light and glory, even with an innocent, holy, and divine soul and mind, homogeneal to the children of men; as with a veil, whereby the Most High condescended to the low condition of man, and in whom also man, being refined as the tried gold, and thereby fitted for the holy One, can approach to him, as by a proper medium, and therein dwell with the Lord, and enjoy him for ever.

of all human kind were upon him, and when he trod the wine-press alone, with none to assist him. Now all my past sins were pardoned and done away; my own willings, runnings, searchings and strivings, were at an end; and all my carnal reasonings and conceivings about the knowledge of God, and the mysteries of religion, were over; which had long exercised my mind, being then natural, both day and night, and taken away my desire of food and natural repose. But now my sorrows ended, and my anxious From henceforth I desired to know nothing cares were done away; and this true fear but the Lord, and to feed on that bread of life being, to me, the initiation into wisdom, I now which he alone can give, and did not fail to found the true sabbath, a holy, heavenly, minister daily, and oftener than the morning: divine, and free rest, and most sweet repose. and yet, of his own free will and goodness, This deep exercise being over, I slept till the he was pleased to open my understanding, by next morning, and had greater and better re-degrees, into all the needful mysteries of his freshment and comfort than I had felt for some weeks before.

The next day I found my mind calm and free from anxiety, in a state like that of a young child. In this condition I remained till night and about the same time in the evening that the visitation, before related, came upon me, my whole nature and being, both mind and body, was filled with the divine presence, in a manner I had never known before, nor had ever thought that such a thing could be; and of which none can form any idea, but what the Holy thing itself doth give.

kingdom, and the truths of his gospel; in the process whereof he exercised my mind in dreams, in visions, in revelations, in prophecies, in divine openings and demonstrations. Also, by his eternal and divine light, grace, spirit, power and wisdom or word, he instructed and informed my mind; and by tempta tions also, and provings, which he suffered satan to minister; that I might see my own weakness and danger, and prove, to the ut most, the force and efficacy of that divine love and truth, by which the Lord, in his boundless goodness and mercy, had thus visited my soul. By all things I saw and Divine Truth was now self-evident; there heard in his wonderful works of creation, wanted nothing else to prove it.. I needed by my own mind and body, by the animals, not to reason about him; all that was super- reptiles, and vegetables of the earth and seded by that divine and truly wonderful sea, their ranks and subserviencies one to evidence and light, which proceeded from another, and all of them to the children of Himself alone, leaving no place for doubt, or men; by the sun, moon and stars, the innuany question at all. For as the sun, in the merable host of heaven, and that boundless open firmament of heaven, is not discovered space which they move in, without interfering, or seen, but by his own light, and the mind or any way annoying one another, all dependof man determines thereby, at sight, and ing one upon another, all connected without a without any train of reasoning, what he is; chasm, and all governed by the steady laws, even so, and more than so, by the overshad- which the Almighty Word and Fiat who gave owing influence and divine virtue of the High-them being, and formed them, placed them est, was my soul assured, that it was the under, and settled them in. Lord. I saw him in his own light, by that blessed and holy medium, which of old he promised to make known to all nations; by that eye which he himself had formed and opened, and also enlightened by the emanation of his own eternal glory.

Thus I was filled with perfect consolation, which none but the Word of Life can declare or give. It was then, and not till then, I knew that God is love, and that perfect love which casteth out all fear. It was then I knew that God is eternal light, and that in him is no darkness at all.

I was highly favoured also with a view of the manner of the operation of the Almighty, VOL. X.-No. 1.

But, as the diadem of all, and the only true and certain way, when it pleased the Most High, by the effusion of his own goodness, to reveal in me the Son of his love, even his wisdom and power, by whom he designed and effected all things, then I was taught to fear him; then I was taught to love him; then, and not aright till then, was my soul instructed and informed indeed.

But these secret operations were confined to my own breast, so that no one knew any thing of them; an alteration was observed in me, but the cause of it was not seen. I put off my usual airs, my jovial actions and address, and laid aside my sword, which I had

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