Imatges de pàgina
PDF
EPUB

Expos'd, to blind the nation's eyes,
A+parchment of prodigious fize;
Concealed behind that ample screen,
There was no filver to be seen.
But to this parchment let the Drapier
Oppose his counter-charm of paper,
And ring Wood's copper in our ears
So loud 'till all the nation hears;
That foundwill make the parchment fhrivel
And drive the conj'rers to the devil:
And when the fky is grown ferene,
Our filver will appear again.

On WOOD the Iron-monger.

SAL

Written in the Year 1725.

ALMONEUS, as the Grecian tale is, Was a mad copper-fmith of Elis; Up at his forge by morning peep, No creature in the lane could fleep. Among a crew of royft'ring fellows Would fit whole ev'nings at the alehouse: His wife and children wanted bread, While he went always drunk to bed.

A patent to William Wood, for coining half-pence.

This vap'ring fcab muft needs devife
To ape the thunder of the fkies:
With brass two fiery fteeds he shod,
To make a clátt'ring as they trod.
Of polish'd brass his flaming car
Like lightning dazzled from afar,
And up he mounts into the box,
And he muft thunder, with a pox.
Then furious he begins his march,
Drives rattling o'er a brazen arch:
With squibs and crackers arm'd, to throw
Among the trembling croud below.
All ran to prayers, both priests and laity,
To pacify this angry deity;

When Jove, in pity to the town,

With real thunder knock'd him down. Then what a huge delight were all in, To fee the wicked varlet fprawling; They fearch'd his pockets on the place, And found his copper all was base; They laugh'd at fuch an Irish blunder, To take the noise of brass for thunder.

proper,

The moral of this tale is
Apply'd to Wood's adulter'd copper:
Which, as he fcatter'd, we like dolts
Miftook at firft for thunder-bolts;

Before

от

Before the Drapier fhot a letter,
(Nor Jove himself could do it better)
Which, lighting on th' impoftor's crown,
Like real thunder knock'd him down.

WOOD an INS E c T.

B

Written in the Year 1725.

Y long observation I have understood,
That two little vermin are kin to
Will Wood.

The first is an infect they call a wood-louse,
That folds up itself in itself for a house:
As round as a ball, without head, without
tail,

Inclos'd cap-a-pe in a strong coat of mail.
And thus William Wood to my fancy ap-

pears

In fillets of brafs roll'd up to his ears:
Andover these fillets he wifely has thrown,
To keep out of danger,* a doublet of stone,

The loufe of the wood for a med'cine is
us'd,

Or swallow'd alive, or skilfully bruis'd.

*He was in jail for debt.

And

And let but our mother Hibernia contrive To fwallow Will Wood either bruis'd or

alive,

She need be no more with the jaundice pofseft,

Or fick of obftructions, and pains in ber cheft.

The next is an infect we call a wood-worm, That lies in old wood like a hare in her

form;

With teeth or with claws it will bite or will fcratch,

And chambermaids chriften this worm a death-watch;

Because like a watch it always cries click: Then woe be to thofe in the houfe who are fick:

For, as fure as a gun, they will give up the ghoft,

If the maggot cries click, when it fcratches the poft.

But akettle of fcalding hot water injected Infallibly cures the timber affected:

The omen is broken, the danger is over; The maggot will die, and the fick will re

cover.

Such

Such a worm was Will Wood, when he fcratch'd at the door

Of a governing ftatesman or favourite

whore :

The death of our nation he feem'd to foretel, And the found of his brafs we took for our knell.

But now, fince the Drapier hath heartily maul'd him,

I think the best thing we can do is to scald him.

For which operation there's nothing more

proper

Than the liquor he deals in, his own melted copper;

Unless, like the Dutch, you rather wouldboil This coiner of traps in a cauldron of oil. Then chufe which you pleafe, and let each bring a faggot,

For our fear's at an end with the death of the maggot.

A cant word in Ireland for a counterfeit half-penny.

ΤΟ

« AnteriorContinua »