Special grace.

renouncing the flesh, and all the secret as well as open works of the flesh, and by following Jesus humbly and thoroughly in the regeneration. In the poverty of carnal nature, the Lord will manifest the riches of his grace. Thou must be poor in thine own spirit, or thou canst not be rich in his. He filleth the hungry with good things, but those that are increased with their own goods, or build upon their own spiritual or temporal attainments, he will always send empty away.

O Lord, look upon me a poor and helpless creature, who cannot so much as look up to thee for aid, without thy special grace for that end. How can I live upon thee, my Saviour, unless thou come down to me in this dark and wretched world, and visit me with thy salvation! I have waited for thy salvation, O Lord; and I would still patiently wait in all the ways of thine appointment, expecting thy presence in this troubled pool to bless me. I expect thee, and only thee. None else can do me good. My soul craveth for true and immortal life; and this is thy gift: O give it unto me. In all thy means of grace, let my heart wait for thy grace by the means. "Teach me to bless thee for these means, when I have them; and to trust thee for them, when I have them not; yea, to trust thee without means, when I have no hope of them." Without thy presence all outward things are barren and dry; and my soul can find no sustenance. Lead me, O my gracious Shepherd, by thine own hand to the green pastures, and beside the waters of thy holy rest; restoring my soul, and conducting me in the paths of righteousness for thy name's sake. So shall I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, neither fearing nor

Self-seeking.

finding any evil, and at length arrive at the heavenly house of my God, in which I shall dwell for ever.

CHAP. IV.

ON SELF-SEEKING.

As they that are in the flesh, cannot please God at all; so they, that follow the flesh in any instance, do so far displease him. This flesh is a subtle adversary, and will creep into our duties as well as our sins: mixing itself under a thousand - forms into almost all that we can say, or think, or do.

Who could expect to feel this deceiver in the deepest contrition of soul, or to find him in peals of groans and showers of tears? Yet self will endeavour to make a man proud of this very humility, be plumed upon his own abasements, and be fancying himself something in the midst of his confessions about his vileness and nothing.

A poor soul shall own itself, with much pain and sincerity, to be a miserable sinner; and self, from this very acknowledgment, will stir up a notion of worth in the creature, and give it to believe that there are some seeds at least of excellency within itself, which others have not, and for having of which he is higher or better than they. Self will bid some men confess themselves sinners, that they may be considered as saints. To take them at their word, would mortify and displease them.

When the heart of the believer is melted in duty, and enjoys the liveliest frame of commu

Self-seeking.

nion and love; how often and how much is self to be found therein, either attempting to puff up with an high opinion, or to instil a carnal security, concerning its spiritual interest and welfare? If it can abate the power and watchfulness of faith, it will lay a ground of distress to the believer in the next trial; so that he will soon find himself to be yet in the flesh, and that (as one says)" He must never think to put off bis armour, till he is ready for others to put on his shroud."

A man may appear excellent in religious conversation, and be eminent in public duties: he may speak and write much, and perhaps well, upon the things of God, and may recommend them with zeal to others; and yet so much of self may be in all, that when he looks over his heart, and discovers it, he will rather find reason to be ashamed of the whole, than to be satisfied with any one part of it. I know not, whether, in writing these pages, there be not so much of this evil mixing itself, as to defile and almost nullify any good that may be in them. And though I can humbly look to God for the sincerity and uprightness of my general aim, yet such are my apprehensions of my own carnality, vanity, emptiness, and self-love, and of the sinfulness of giving them indulgence, in serious things especially, that I am sometimes inclined to throw the whole aside. I see this hateful principle in almost every thing I can say or do, and am ashamed of myself and of it; but still it rises again and again, though often detected; and therefore I am obliged continually to cast myself, with a redoubled sense of the mean, weak, vain, and vile condition of nature, upon the sole and free mercy of God my Saviour. In success of duty for God, and in being the

Self condemned.

instrument of good to others, this selfishness of our hearts will endeavour, if not to rob God entirely of his glory, yet at least to share with him in it. Self will be pleased, because we ourselves have been concerned, because we have been honoured, and because by us the Lord hath been magnified in the souls of others. It is self, which is vexed when this is not the case, and when we have toiled for nothing, or others have caught the fishes. Whereas our spirit should rejoice in the will of the Lord, and be as much pleased when his work prospers in other hands, as in our own. And thus indeed they would rejoice, if this corrupt self did not mix with and seek its own establishment in the most spiritual exercises of our souls. We too much forget, that we are only instruments, and that we can do no more of ourselves for God, than our pens can write down our thoughts, when not taken up by our hands.

All this may serve to show, what a severe jealousy we should hold concerning ourselves. We should not only pray, but watch unto prayer; we should both perform our religious duties with zeal, and should examine well the zeal with which we perform them; we should abound in every work and labour of love, and should entreat for wisdom and grace, that flesh and self may not abound in them too; we should ask again and again for a single eye and a simple heart, that all the glory of every good may be given to God its right owner, and that we may be kept in our true place, admiring his mercy, and showing forth, with humble simplicity, his honour and praise.

E

Different graces.

CHAP. V.

ON THE DIFFERENT APPEARANCES OF GRACE IN DIFFERENT PERSONS.

THERE are diversities of operations, but it is the same God who worketh all in all. Some believers

are remarkable for the strength of their faith in trials even unto death; others for their liveliness and activity in duty; others for their wisdom, conduct, and prudence both in temporals and spirituals; others for their zeal in defence of the truth; others for their knowledge in the mysteries of the truth; others for their patience, meekness, and gentleness; others for their submission to the will of God; others for outward usefulness in the church; and others for an inward and spiritual life of communion with God. But all these are the various gifts and graces of the Holy Spirit, dividing to every man severally as he will, and not the talents or abilities of fallen nature. They are also given to every man, who hath them, to profit withal, according to his place in the church or in the world. He, who hath one of these graces, should not undervalue or despise him who hath another; for the Giver is the same, though his gifts may be granted for different ends.

Very often particular graces are bestowed to counteract and oppose particular corruptions, of which the Lord himself can be the only true judge. The situations of some Christians require gifts of grace, which might be less necessary, or less manifestative of the divine glory in others, than they would be in them. The Lord distri