Upon the horrid Plot discovered by Harlequin the B---- of R- $ French Dog.

I

In a Dialogue between a Whig and a Tory.

Written in the Year 1722.

ASK'D a Whig the other Night;

How came this wicked Plot to Light:
He answer'd, that a Dog of late
Inform'd a Minifter of State.

Said I, from thence I nothing know
For, are not all Informers fo?

A Villain, who his Friend betrays,
We style him by no other Phrafe ;
And so a perjur'd Dog denotes
Porter, and Prendergast, and Oates.
And forty others I could name—

Whig. But you must know this Dog was lame.

A

Tory. A weighty Argument indeed ; Your Evidence was lame. Proceed:

Come, help your lame Dog o'er the Style. Whig. Sir, you mistake me all this while: I mean a Dog, without a Joke,

Can howl, and bark, but never spoke.

Tory. I'm still to feek which Dog you mean;
Whether Curr Plunket, or Whelp Skean,
An English or an Irish Hound;

Or t'other Puppy that was drown'd,
Or Mason that abandon'd Bitch:
Then pray be free, and tell me which;
For, ev'ry Stander-by was marking
That all the Noise they made was barking;
You pay them well; the Dogs have got
Their Dogs-beads in a Porridge-pot:
And 'twas but juft; for, wife Men say,
That, every Dog must have his Day.
Dog W

laid a Quart of Nog on't,
He'd either make a Hog or Dog on't,
And look't fince he has got his Wish,
As if he had thrown down a Difb.
Yet, this I dare foretel you from it,
He'll foon return to his own Vomit.

Whig. Befides, this horrid Plot was found
By Neno after he was drown'd.

Tory. Why then the Proverb is not right,
Since you can teach dead Dogs to bite,
Whig. 1 prov'd my Propofition full;

But, Jacobites are strangely dull.
Now, let me tell you plainly, Sir,
Our Witness is a real Curr,

A Dog of Spirit for his Years,

Has twice two Legs, two hanging Ears;
His Name is Harlequin, I wot,

And that's a Name in ev'ry Plot:
Refolv'd to fave the British Nation,
Though French by Birth and Education
His Correfpondence plainly dated,
Was all decypher'd, and tranflated,
His Answers were exceeding pretty
Before the fecret wife Committee;
Confefs't as plain as he could bark;
Then with his Fore-foot fet his Mark.

Tory. Then all this while have I been bubbled; I thought it was a Dog in Doublet:

The Matter now no longer sticks ;

For Statefmen never want Dog-tricks.

But,

But, fince it was a real Curr,

And not a Dog in Metaphor,

I give you Joy of the Report,

That he's to have a Place at Ct.

Whig. Yes, and a Place he will grow rich in ; A Turn-fpit in the R-1 Kitchen,

Sir, to be plain, I tell you what;
We had Occafion for a Plot;

And, when we found the Dog begin it,
We guefs't the B's Foot was in it.
Tory. I own it was a dang'rous Project ;

'And you have prov'd it by Dog-Logick
Sure fuch Intelligence between

A Dog and B

ne'er was seen,

Till you began to change the Breed;
Your Bs all are D--gs indeed.

THE

THE

Furniture of a Woman's MIND.

A

Written in the Year 1727.

SET of Phrases learn't by Rote;
A Paffion for a Scarlet-Coat;

When at a Play, to laugh, or cry,
Yet cannot tell the Reafon why:
Never to hold her Tongue a Minute ;
While all she prates has nothing in it,
Whole Hours can with a Coxcomb fit,
And take his Nonsense all for Wit:

Her Learning mounts to read a Song,
But, half the Words pronouncing wrong;

Has ev'ry Repartee in Store,

She spoke ten Thousand Times before.
Can ready Compliments fupply
On all Occafions, cut and dry.
Such Hatred to a Parfon's Gown,
The Sight will put her in a Swown.

For