To convey a tolerably sized square, or oblong square box, into this eyry, though empty be the box, requires no trifling corporeal agency; and, if well filled and packed, with store of weighty kind, can hardly be done by the exertions of four lusty and determined fellows; and as the stairs are generally winding, and narrowed, in proportion to the degree or angle of ascent, the side walls are, of course, knocked to pieces by the corners of said box; while, give and take being fair play, the damage is returned by said side walls upon the corners of said box. One may often trace the consequences of this balance of accounts, from the commencement of the ascent, to the arrival at the summit. I have observed powerful men in great danger of serious injury by their exertions in this arduous and ridiculous engagement. When I have remonstrated against all this waste of time, and strength-all this mischief, inconvenience, and absurdity, I have been asked, with such look of enquiry as intimated that information was really desired-certainly wanted" where would you place the lumber room?" Here the first attention paid to the question, comes, as it were naturally, in the form of replication, or rebound, by meeting question with question for instance, what would you think of placing it on the roof of the house, and fashioning it into the form of a dome or cupola? Thus it might become an occasion of double advantage, by combining the grand desiderata of ornament and use. If you discover any insurmountable objection to this proposal; why, then-now, I know that the proposition, which is coming, will seem monstrously ridiculous -you are beginning to laugh alreadybut, just for a moment, suppose that a man were to place his lumber room-the small domestic warehouse-the room employed to contain many large and heavy articles, and these, with divers others, necessarily, perhaps not unfrequently, to be brought from, and returned to their "watch tower in the skies!" suppose, I pray you, merely in the way of experiment-nay, but my dear Sir, remember "fiat experimentum," was the dictate of Bacon's philosophysuppose, then, that such a receptacle as we have been talking of, was to be placed. -observe it is but an experiment!-suppose it were to be placed on-the ground floor!!-I knew you would laugh But this is not all: another laugh lin gers in reserve. I go on to propose. This reminds me of a gentleman, with the friends of whom I was acquainted, and by whom I was informed, that he had made thirteen proposals of marriage to as many ladiesin vain-in the fourteenth he succeeded. I wish that fortune may be equally prosperous with the lumber room, and another or two, still to be instanced.-The ringleader of these-consequently the first to be knocked down by the adversary, and the old school-such is my apprehension and alarm-amounts to an admission room -now, the laugh! even so-an admistion room-a definite, specified, appropriate receptacle for-gentle, but, perhaps, serious reader, I find a tremulous sensation of reluctance come across me; an extraordinary resistance interposed between the point of my pen and the surface of its wanderings; which, taken together, do certainly render my proposal very shy of coming forward. But I am resolved toout with it. I left off at the words "receptacle for"-the sentence must and shall be finished, by an honourable confession, that I meant, but durst not write it-for -great coats and HATS, most gentle reader! -How useless!!-why should not these paltry articles continue to hang on short, straight, small headed brass nails in the passage, vestibule, or hall, as heretofore; where the worst that can easily happen, extends no further than to their being floored a few times every day, as the family or the domestics pass to and fro; and to their being covered with dust, black or white, somewhat thickly, to be sure, as often as the house-brush traverses the boards, or flags, whose palpable contributions they are destined to receive? These another brush, well applied, can again disperse; while the additional cost, per annum, necessarily incurred by this constant exposure to dirt, and contention with casualty, cannot, when these are even confederated, expand to more than a triple or quadruple purchase, instead of a single one. I have yet a very important proposition to bring forward: important certainly to all those who are anxious for the comfortable accommodation of their guests, their families, and themselves; and zealous in the exercise of one of the offices of hospitality, agreeably to the best provision and mode now in use; but which, in its existing imperfect state, does very partially administer to the pleasure and the comfort of guests, |