Thy word was the instrument, and thy Spirit the worker. He new-created me in Christ Jesus; he renewed me in the spirit of my mind; he made darkness light before me, and rough places plain. By his teaching I know thy truth, by his grace I enjoy it, by his power I am kept therein, and shall be kept, I trust, to the end. Lord, all the glory of conversion wrought in me, and of thy complete salvation wrought for me, wholly belongeth unto thee from beginning to end!

It was in this way I received Christ; and thy word, O Lord, assureth me it is the true way; because it giveth to thee all the glory, and secureth to me all the benefit. In this way of humbly receiving, I must also walk continually. I have nothing of my own but sin. Thou hast nothing, O my Redeemer, but grace and mercy for thy people. Help me to receive out of this eternal fulness grace for grace, according to my need, that I may walk unto all well-pleasing, and adorn thy doctrine in all things. I would love much, because much hath been forgiven me. I would serve heartily, because thou hast kindly done great things indeed for me. I would live holily, because it is the way to thy kingdom, and the very happiness of thy kingdom itself. Let, let me, my Saviour, be more like unto thee; for, Lord, I would be thine, and only thine, for ever!

Thus my heart often venteth its desires: though at times it is unsteady, dull, and ready to droop under the weight and grossness of a sinful body. I have no remedy for this malady but Christ, sought for in humble prayers. And when my prayers are

faint and drooping, as they too frequently are, I bewail and am sick of myself; but I dare not leave him, lest a worse evil befal me. I therefore, in compunction of spirit, cast myself down before him as low as I can, praying for prayer, and entreating him that he would not leave me to my evil self, but enliven soul with an answer of peace. my When I

can put forth this act of faith, there is often peace in the act itself which refreshes me, and usually comfort follows upon it, or (what is better) more faith to throw all upon him, and to live more by him, for the time to come.

CHAPTER III.

How do I live upon Christ?

ALAS! my soul, in spiritual things, thou too often livest upon thyself. Thou seekest in frames, in forms, in creatures, and in animal life, what is only to be found in thy Redeemer, even a right inward peace and stability of mind. Outward duties are well in their place, but they have no divine life in themselves, and can give none to thee. They are to be performed, but not trusted in; to be used with grace, but not to buy grace. They are as the scaffold to the building, a mean for carrying on the spiritual work, but not the end of the great design. In the power of Christ they are blessings; without his power, they have no life or help in them.

Many treat the ordinances as a fair substitute for a serious and constant watchfulness over themselves, for patient devotedness to God, and for real holiness of heart and life, instead of the mean, and only the mean, which the Lord hath appointed, for leading up the soul to all this, as their proper and indispensable end. By such worshippers, the holy means are turned into a profane and detestable idol (as was the case with some of old, Isaiah lxvi. 3.) in the sight of the Lord, who doth not regard lip-service, nor any carnal or corporal attentions only, "but the poor and the contrite spirit," that can tremble at, while it hears and believes, his holy word. .

way,

Remember this for thyself, O my soul. Thy first and last trust must be in Jesus. He is the the truth, and the life. Without him, all prayers, praises, rites, and ordinances, dwindle into carcasses without a soul. Every performance will be carnal and corporal, unless the Saviour fills it with his Divine Spirit and when this comes, then there is a sweet communion of heart, and reviving of the soul after Christ: then there appears a delightful view behind the veil of outward ordinances, such as no carnal eye can behold, of the Lord in his goodness, beauty, grandeur, blessedness, and glory.

Mere professors stick in the flesh, and mistake the worship of the body, and the motion of the lips, for the love, taste, action, and adoration of the soul. Religion is too sublime for those, who are rather carried through a course than live in it. The road indeed may be a good one; but these no more travel therein, than a corpse in a hearse can be said to be making a journey.

My soul, thy life and thy liveliness are all laid up in Christ, and to be drawn from him according to thy need. Thou hast no stock left to thy own disposal. As the manna was received daily from above, so thou must live out of thyself for thy spiritual daily bread. Having pleaded thy pardon by his blood, and thy justification by his righteousness, thou must live on him for grace still to plead both, to enjoy both, to commune with him from time to time, to deny thyself, to renounce the world and the devil, to master corruptions, to be growing wiser in his word, and more rich in its experience, and, in short, to use him for thine all in all. The whole of this is spiritual, therefore difficult work; and thou art quite unable to perform it in any respect, but through that strength which is made perfect in weakness. If Christ indeed be thy life, then, because he liveth, thou shalt live also.

In living thus upon Christ, thou art to live above thyself, and certainly above every thing, which thou thyself canst perform. This is the true and sublime life of the "inner man," which is not corruptible, nor dependeth for vigour upon corruptible things. It is therefore a hidden life. "Ye are dead," says the Apostle," and your life is hid with Christ in God." No outward or carnal eye can see it at all, except in some of its holy outward effects, the true excellence of which it cannot apprehend: and the spiritual understanding of other believers can only discern its inward truth and growth, but in proportion as they themselves are spiritually grown up in Christ Jesus the Lord. A mere reasoner in religion, knows nothing of the matter.

As thou art not to live upon thyself, O my soul,

so thou canst not live this true life by the aid or

opinion of others.

to thee, it is thy

If they are instruments of grace heavenly Father who employeth them for that end. They themselves, as well as thou, must live upon him for all their wisdom, grace, and strength, and not "by the life of their own hand." Christ is, and must be, as much their life as he is thine.

Thou sometimes waxest and wanest in thy duties, as the moon in her light. At one time, thou art full of spiritual appetite and vigour; at another, in lowness and want of strength. The cause is not in the Sun of Righteousness, who is always alike; but in thee who turnest not the same aspect always to him, and therefore hast not always the same light and heat. If thou thinkest to get brightness from the stars around thee, instead of thy Sun, thou wilt be like the dark part of the moon turned away from the natural sun, which often scarcely appears, or, when it doth, appears very dull. In all providences, ordinances, and situations, Christ must be thy point of view, thy succour, thy light, thy life, and thy all; or they will be found, however excellent in his hand, only beggarly elements in thine.

In all things that are truly divine and spiritual, the flesh soon becomes weary, and flags, and fails. When the exercise grows difficult especially, then corrupt nature soon declines, and cannot sustain or endure the toil. Hence it is, that so many seem to receive the word with joy, and to run well for a time, who, when persecutions or trials arise, having