no root in themselves, begin to find dislikes and offences, and so presently fall away. Their fallow hearts have not been broken up deeply enough by the gospel-plough (that is, the law) to cover well the gospel-seed. The seed of the word hath never been "hidden in the heart;" and so hath taken no root downward in humble and secret contrition, nor grown into substance upwards, to "bring forth fruit unto perfection."

This hidden and spiritual life is often most active and strong, when the flesh is lowest and hath least to do. "Be silent, O all flesh, before the Lord; for he is raised up out of his holy habitation." When the Lord is risen upon the soul, all that is weak and carnal is as nothing before him. A sweet proof of this may sometimes be found in sick and dying believers. How do they triumph in spirit, with a glorious liveliness, over all the debilities of a dying body! "When their heart and their flesh fail," God then appears most eminently to be the very "strength of their heart, and their portion for

ever."

There is a "knowledge of Christ after the flesh," which will carry men a great way into all the splendours of religious profession. It shall make a man look and talk seriously; carry him constantly to ordinances; give him great personal zeal and confidence; enable him to be very exact in all outward discipline and form of doctrine; nay, it shall bring him with a fervent activity (if a minister) into the pulpit, help him to deliver perhaps sound discourses with seeming earnestness and able oratory, so that

multitudes shall hear and admire, and possibly be wrought upon by him; and yet in himself it may be mere flesh, and the poor low knowledge of Christ by the flesh, after all. There is sometimes a little true life in this, and then it is strengthened and refined by trials and temptations; but when there is none, then by time or trouble, or some other thing, it will finally fall away: "If they had really been of us, no doubt they would have continued with us." O my soul, there are depths of Satan as well as of God; and there is no security for thee, but in renouncing the flesh, and all the secret as well as open works of the flesh, and by following Jesus thoroughly in the regeneration. In the poverty of

carnal nature, the Lord will manifest the riches of his grace. Thou must be poor in thine own spirit, or thou canst not be rich in his. "He filleth the hungry with good things; but those that are increased with their own goods, he will always send empty away."

O Lord, look upon me a poor and helpless creature, who cannot so much as look up to thee for aid, without thy special grace for that end. How can I live upon thee, my Saviour, unless thou come down to me in this dark and wretched world, and visit me with thy salvation! I have waited for

thy salvation, O Lord; and I would still patiently wait in all the ways of thine appointment, expecting thy presence in the troubled pool to bless me. I expect thee, and only thee. None else can do me good. My soul craveth for true and immortal life, and this is thy gift: O give it unto me. In all thy

the means.

means of grace, let my heart wait for thy grace by "Teach me to bless thee for means, when I have them; and to trust thee for means, when I have them not; yea, to trust thee without means, when I have no hope of them." Without thy pre

sence all outward things are barren and dry; and my soul can find no sustenance: lead me, O my gracious Shepherd, by thine own hand to the green pastures, and beside the waters of thy holy rest; restoring my soul, and conducting me in the paths of righteousness for thy name's sake. So shall I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, neither fearing nor finding any evil, and at length arrive at the heavenly house of my God, in which I shall dwell for ever

and ever.

CHAPTER IV.

On Self-seeking.

As they that are in the flesh cannot please God at all so they that follow the flesh in any instance, do so far displease him. This flesh is a subtle adversary, and will creep into our duties as well as our sins; mixing itself, under a thousand forms, into almost all that we can say, or think, or do.

Who could expect to feel this deceiver in the deepest contrition of soul, or to find him in peals of groans and showers of tears? Yet self will endeavour to make a man proud of this very humility, be

plumed upon his own abasements, and be fancying himself something, in the midst of his confessions about his vileness and nothingness.

A poor soul shall own itself, with much pain and sincerity, to be a miserable sinner; and self, from this very acknowledgment, will stir up a notion of worth in the creature, and give it to believe, that there are some seeds, at least, of excellency within itself, which others have not, and for having of which he is higher or better than they. Self will bid some men confess themselves sinners, that they may be To take them at their word,

considered as saints.

would mortify and displease them.

When the heart of the believer is melted in duty, and enjoys the liveliest frame of communion and love; how often and how much is self to be found therein, either attempting to puff up with a high opinion, or to instil a carnal security, concerning its spiritual interest and welfare? If it can abate the

power and watchfulness of faith, it will lay a ground of distress to the believer in the next trial; so that he will soon find himself to be yet in the flesh, and that, as one says, "He must never think to put off his armour, till he is ready for others to put on his shroud."

A man may appear excellent in religious conversation, and be eminent in public duties; he may speak and write much, and perhaps well, upon the things of God, and may recommend them with zeal to others; and yet so much of self may be in all, that, when he looks over his heart and discovers it, he will rather find reason to be ashamed of the whole,

than to be satisfied with any one part of it. I know not, whether, in writing these pages, there be not so much of this evil mixing itself, as to defile and almost nullify any good that may be in them. And though I can humbly look to God for the sincerity and uprightness of my general aim, yet such are my apprehensions of my own carnality, vanity, emptiness, and self-love, and of the sinfulness of giving them indulgence, in serious things especially, that I am sometimes inclined to throw the whole aside. I see

this hateful principle in almost every thing I can say or do, and am ashamed of myself, and of it; but still it rises again and again, though often detected; and therefore I am obliged continually to cast myself, with a redoubled sense of my mean, weak, vain, and vile condition by nature, upon the sole and free mercy of God my Saviour.

In success of duty for God, and in being the instrument of good to others, this selfishness of our hearts will endeavour, if not to rob God entirely of his glory, yet at least to share with him in it. Self will be pleased, because we ourselves have been concerned, because we have been honoured, and because by us the Lord hath been magnified in the souls of others. It is self which is vexed, when this is not the case, and when we have toiled for nothing, or others have caught the fishes. Whereas our spirits should rejoice in the will of the Lord, and be as much pleased when his work prospers in other hands, as in our own. And thus indeed they would rejoice, if this corrupt self did not mix with and seek its own establishment in the most spiritual exer