Arousal : the secret logic of sexual fantasies
"Sexual Fantasies. Everyone has them, but no one knows what they mean. People are curious about and often confused by the things that arouse them, yet they are often too ashamed to reveal their most private fantasies to their partners or even their therapists. In this fascinating and provocative book, Dr. Michael J. Bader offers a groundbreaking theory of sexual desire, one that will liberate men and women and enable them to better understand their sexual preferences." "Drawing on his twenty-five years as a psychotherapist and psychoanalyst, Dr. Bader demonstrates that rather than being programmed by biology or society, sexual fantasies and preferences are really psychological antidotes to unconscious dangers. Armed with this novel theory, men and women will no longer need to feel ashamed about what arouses them or confused about what arouses others. Dr. Bader sensitively tells the stories of his patients and explains the meaning of their sexual fantasies. In terms refreshingly free of jargon, he reveals how his profound new theory can be used to decipher a wide variety of sexual fantasies and behavior, ranging from ordinary preferences about positions in bed to flamboyant scenarios worthy of the Marquis de Sade. And yet Dr. Bader's exciting new theory transcends the realm of individual psychology. Readers will come away with a radically new understanding of such issues as sexual chemistry and boredom, cybersex, pornography, and the differences in how men and women get excited."--Jacket
x, 293 pages ; 22 cm
9780312269333, 9780312302429, 0312269331, 0312302428
48055737
1. How Sex Works
2. Sexual Fantasies as Antidotes to Guilt and Worry
3. Born to Lose: Sexual Fantasies as Antidotes to Shame and Rejection
4. From the Conventional to the Bizarre: Interpreting Sexual Fantasies
5. Sexual Pleasure and Boredom in Relationships
6. The Role of Sexual Fantasies in Psychotherapy
7. The Social Meaning of Sexual Fantasies
Conclusion: The Future of Sex: Final Reflections, Unanswered Questions